FMA Cast Auditions
by Chachamaru15
Summary: Auditions are being held for FMA and anyone is welcome! Well, not anyone.
1. Chapter 1

FMA Cast Auditions

director: Alright everyone, lets see who's next. Um, who is going to play Alphonse Elric?

Little girl: um..well..I could.

Director: Well, er..Al is a big suit of armor so..um..next!

Envy: I Will!

Director: Envy you can't play Al! Your already playing..er..yourself!

Envy: hmph! Envy walks away pissed off at the director

Director: Isn't there Anyone that can play Al?

Gundam Robot: in a deep voice I would LOVE to!

director: that's it, I quit!

unknown voice: Never fear director! Good Acting has been a tradition in my family for generations!

Director: Who are you?

Mysterious person walks out from the shadows

voice: I am none other than...Alex Louis Armstrong!

Everyone falls over anime style

director: Someone PLEASE find us someone to play Al!

Okay i know this is kinda stupid but it was just an idea i had. Please give me a lot of reviews and I will continue!


	2. Chapter 2

FMA Cast Auditions Part Two

director: Okay, who's going to play Lust?

Barbie: Like, I will!

director: Um, you're a retard.

Ken: in a deep manly voice I would be perfect for the part!

Director:Lust is a woman..and you're just..gross.

Envy:I'll do it !

Director: You can't you're already playing yourself!

Envy: walks off and throws a tantrum

Winry: I'll do it I guess, but only if I can hit people with my wrench!

Director: Uh, I don't think that's in the script. Besides, you're short and blonde and Lust is supposed to have boobs as big as her head!

Winry: I'm working on it!

Lust: I think I should play the part.

Director: You're perfect! You look just like Lust!

Lust:Ya know, a lot of people think that . But in reality I'm Lust's evil twin sister.

Director: I thought Lust was Evil!

Lust:Oh...


	3. Chapter 3

FMA Cast Auditions Part 3

Director: Phew Alright everyone lets keep going. Who's going to play Edward Elric?

Envy: I-

Director: Don't even say it!

Envy: hmph!

Winry: Hey, maybe I could-

Director: b-but you're a girl.

Winry: So! You wouldn't let me play Lust, and I thought the only requirement for this part was that you had to be short and blonde!

Director: sigh Alright, you can play Ed..but only if I can't find anyone better!

Winry: Yay! I'm the Fullmetal Alchemist!

Director: Not yet you're not!

Ed: Uh….what's everybody doing?

Director: um,well that is…

Ed: you weren't trying to replace me were you!

Director: n-no of course not. I just thought you said you didn't want the part!

Ed: It all depends on who gets the part of Roy Musting! From your description of him he sounds like real asshole!

Director: look , I'm sure that whoever gets the part of Roy will be a nice guy and we'll all GROW to love him in time.

Ed: what did you mean by that you wannabe director!

Please Please Please review! Hardly anyone has reviewed and I need reviews RIGHT THIS MINUTE! Ahem..anyway I hope you are enjoying the FMA Cast Auditions so far.Don't forget to check out my other stories: A Disturbing Romance( in the yugioh section) and Ed's Shiny New Boots( in FMA section)!


	4. Chapter 4

FMA Cast Auditions part 4

new director: Hello, auditioners! I'm looking forward to a fun day of auditions today!

Everyone else:boooooooooooooooooo!

New director: How's this then? Yo, how you doin'? I hope you's ready to do some actin', dawgs!

Everyone else: booooooooooooooooooooo!

Real director: Get out of here! shoots daggers from eyes at imposter

imposter director: BYE!

Real director: And now we shall continue auditions. Today we will try for the part of Roy Mustang. silences Envy with a glare We all know who wants the part, even though he already has his _own_ part, for heaven's sake. Who else?

Lust: My twin stole my part, so I want this one!

Director: Oh, come on! Roy is a man, and you are a ... umm, do homonculi have genders? Anyway, you definitely don't look like a man.

Lust: So? The only requirements are to be hot and stuck on yourself. I'm not sure about the second one, but noone's hotter than me.

Director: point taken. Next!

Lust walks off in a huff.

Hughes: I can play the part!

Director: Um, Roy doesn't have glasses. You do. Next!

Hughes: I know when I'm beaten. Hey do you wanna see a picture of my baby girl? Isn't she so cute?

Director: I don't know why I didn't leave you to my colleague. Will someone come forward, please?

Roy: walking down a red carpet with "I'm too sexy" playing in the background I believe I'm supposed to come to an audition? Come on, let's make it snappy! I've got a lunch planned with Orlando Bloom in half an hour.

Director: Exactly! This guy knows exactly what I'm looking for. You could be big, whoever you are.

Roy: Um, hello? Roy Mustang? I am big, you bozo!

Director: Now that that's over with, let's break for lunch! turns off microphone That gives me exactly an hour to drown myself in ramen.

To be continued...

note: this chapter was written by my friend jrlibrarian. The next chapter will be by me. So..yeah.


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Note: Sorry I haven't been updating lately,I just lost interest in this story for a while.Also I just had jaw surgery on Tuesday and so I'm recovering.I'll try to update as soon as I can, but I'm not sure when it will be.Thank you for your kind reviews!

-Chachamaru


	6. Chapter 6

Just Wondering: Which character should I have auditions for next? I'm taking suggestions,so go ahead and speak up!


	7. Chapter 7

FMA Cast Auditions Part 5

director:Okay, today we will be having auditions for the part of Maes Hughes! Is everyone ready?

Everyone:No!

director:Is everyone pumped?

Everyone:NO!

director:Does everyone have clean underwear on?

Ed:Nope!

Director:Alrighty then,let's get started!

Goku(from Saiyuki not DBZ): How 'bout I play Hughes?

Director:Well,erm..aren't you a little young?

Goku: hmph! When you look at it that way,aren't you a little OLD!

Director:Well,I never!

Hakkai:Now,Now,that was rude.Goku,appologize.

Goku: wails Do I have to?

Gojyo:YES! Hurry up,I think I saw a cute blonde over there..

Goku: mumbles Sorry,mister director..asshole..something

director: Good enough!

Sanzo:Come on then,let's go already!

Goku: sigh I thought I'd be perfect for the part..

Sanzo: Well, you're certainly obnoxious enough.

Goku: Hey!

Director:ANYWAY,on with the auditions

Jack Sparrow: I think I'LL take the part!

Director: NO WAY!

Jack: Why not?

Director: Because,you'd steal the show!The star is supposed to be Edward ,you know!

Jack: Well,let's put it this way:Give me a part, because I'm not leaving until I get one!

Director: big, heaving sigh Fine.You can be the random bystander in scene 12

Jack: What?

Director: Take it or leave it.

Jack: This is an outrage! You'll never work in this town again! walks off in a huff

Will Turner: Sorry about him,he hasn't had his midmorning green tea yet.

Jack: shouts over his shoulder Will, hurry up! And where's my tea?

Will: Coming!

Director: Heh,someone sure has you wrapped around his finger.

Will:You don't know the half of it.

Jack: Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiill,get over here now!

Will:I'm coming, keep your shorts on!

Jack: If you insist.

Director: Great..it's almost the end of the chapter, and we STILL haven't found anyone to play Hughes.I guess that means only one thing...I'll have to play the part!

Everyone: Are you Kidding me?

Director:Mwahahahahahahahahaha! I am not the TRUE director,I am... changes to true form

Everyone: Gasp

Director:...Envy!

Real Director: What do you think you're doing here?

Envy: Hahahahahaha!Now I'm going to play Hughes and there's nothing you can do about it!

Director:But,what about the scene where Envy kills Hughes?How are you going to pull that one off?

Envy:Er...well,I didn't want to play Hughes ANYWAY! runs off and cries

Director:Arggghhh! Who is going to play Hughes?

Orochimaru: I'll do it!

Director: Lord,help us.

Author's Note: Well, there you have it! Yayness, I finally got the next chappie posted! Btw, this isn't my firsy story.My first story is called A Disturbing Romance(in the Yugioh sec.).Please read it! It's funny!(I think..)Anyway, please review and tell me what you thought!Also I'm still taking character suggestions,so throw 'em out there people(not literally 'tho ducks the flying suggestions ).


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